I had a very bad day yesterday at work. It was like a conspiracy. Everyone, from my assistant to each and every one of our clients, had something to complain about. Everyone was disappointed or upset with something. Everyone had something happened to them and they wanted to vent out by nagging and whining to me. It was not a good day yesterday, have I already said so?
To top it all up, I got my period. I was not disappointed or sad. But I am having one of the worst periods ever.Horrible cramps kept me awake most of last night. And I was craving too salty or too sweet all day yesterday too.
Angelos was no help either. He had a very bad day at work too. So on his way home, he called me and said to me that he needs to binge on peperonni pizza and ice cream truffles.HE asked me if it was too much to ask to share them with him, because he did not want to feel bad eating it alone. I had just cooked spinach with brown rice. I got upset, because I was feeling the need to eat bad too all day, and had resisted. And when he said he will bring these foods at home, I realised I am still game to a very good excuse.
My first reaction to his saying, after I got off the phone, was that I have been feeding him core foods for two weeks now and that he has always been so supportive by not bringing anything "dangerous" home, so this one time he needs to eat comfort food, I should be ok with it. I said to myself that I need to be sharing it with him since he asked me just this once. I had to be a good supportive wifey kind of. But this was bull. I have wanted to eat too salty and toos weet all day along. And he offered me the perfect excuse. And I took it so easily and said thank you too!
So I had three slices of peperoni pizza, and three icecream truffles. And had to bite my teeth to stop, cos I would have eaten the entire pizza and the entire box of truffles too. All this sugar made my cramps worse, and that got me even more upset, so I went straight to bed, with this yukky feeling of bloatness and eating something too greesy after days of eating right. While I was walking to thebedroom I asked him to hide the scales, so I won't weigh in in the morning.
When I woke up today, I wanted to call him and ask where he hid the scales. I did not. I did not weigh in yesterday, and I am so bloated from the period, that it is not a good idea. I still have bad cramps. I went to the treadmill and after 5 mins my cramps got worse, so I stopped.
So I made my coffee, and sat on the puter to read your blogs. In a very bad mood. Very. BAD. Mood!!!! The last two weeks, I have been restricting my smokes from 20 to 10 a day, in case I was pregnant. I have smoked 7 already all this hour I am sitting in the PC. I was angry with myself for eating bad yesterday, I was still mad at the clients and their madness yesterday. Then I read Kimba's update. And I calmed down. Then I read Tree's brilliant entry, and I felt even better. Last but not least, I read Beckie's entry, and I had a smile again.
Bottomline is, I have to be honest to myself. So, here are all my beans, spilt for you:
Good thing is that I believe in my ability to deal with the crisis in my life. The crisis is too much right now though.
Bad thing is that I felt all my stress released after the first slice of pizza.
Good thing is that I stopped at the third piece. I could have eaten three more easily. I wanted to. But I stopped.
Bad thing is that I ate the three truffles too.
Good thing is I stopped. The box had twelve, Angelos ate 4, I threw the remaining 5 in the trash bin, and after fifteen minutes I went, open the trash bin, and watched them melting, just to make sure the evil went away.
Bad thing is that I had heart burn all night combined with cramps and slept so little.
Good thing is that I got on the treadmill this morning.
Bad thing is that I could not do a descent work out.
Good thing is that I read Kimba's and Tree's posts that brought me back to reality.
Bad thing is that I wanted to post myself to let it out of my system.
Good thing is that I feel better indeed and I am packing last night's spinach and brown rice for lunch today.
Bad thing is that it is 15 to ten and I am still in pj's and have not yet showered.
Good thing is I don't give a penny. I am the boss, I will be late today!
Bad thing is that I won't be home tonight before long after midnight. Got another rehearsal to go to.
O.M.G.!!!! My brother just called me!!!! I am going to be an auntie again!!!! My sister in law is pregnant on their third child!!!!
Good thing is that life goes on! Gloriously!!!!
That just made my day!!!!
Off to the shower now :)