Yesterday was a very weird day. I was indeed happy to stay home and do all thi scleaning and rearranging. I was so pleased to see all the garbagge ready to be taken out of our home and lives for ever. But after I updated with my clear intention to take a nap, I just could not. Instead, I curled in the sofa, with stuff that I thought lost and had found, and went over them.
First, I went over the pictures from Amsterdam's trip last year. I was really sorry I had this year's pictures left at work, because I wanted to have them here and put last year next to last week and see the difference. I could see how much bigger I was, but there is nothing than two pics put together for a straight forward comparison.
Then, I went over my WW stuff. I found them all. The point tracker, the eating our point tracker, the recipes, the keys, I even found all of my old food journals. I kept them religiously back then.
Then I went and read Kimba's archives from the beginning to September '04. I do this sometimes. I go and re-read old archives of favourite bloggers. I do it seeking for answers, strategies, inspiration, solutions. Or just a good read, same way I reread my favourite books sometimes.
No matter how many times I read something, I always find it a different read than the previous time. It happens to me with films too. When I see a film for a second or even third time, I always find new things that catch my attention, new things that I like or even dislike.
And I, for once more, indulged in Kimba's wisdom. I really could tell, reading her archives from almost a year back, that Kimba is destined to get to goal. Because she is simply organised. And because she is monitoring everything.
The previous was written on Saturday, and saved as a draft, since Angelos woke up and wanted my attention. Then it was groccery shopping, then a walk in an open market, then it was a dvd and a nap, then it was a night in our friends house, eating grilled pork chops and way too many dry fruits, then it was a late Sunday morning, then a coffee out in the sun, then back to Sofia's house, then pasta with smoked salomon, then more laughs and yet another dvd, a slice of pizza for dinner, and a relatively early night too.
But during the entire weekend, Kimba's archives were solidly stuck on my mind.
When I started with this weight loss saga three years ago, I really did not think I will manage to loose all my weight. Having a whole person to loose (remember I started loosing at 130 kilos and I should be between 65 to 70) is not something a master yoyo dieter who has lost and regained over 35 kilos twice finds doable.
But I changed things in my life, and armed with the merits of good therapy I really managed to believe that this time I could actually do it.
What I was loosing and still am though is focus. Mini goals. Measurements. Non scale victories. The things that take my mind of the scale. I also am loosing structure. I am missing a plan. I am a person who can easily get lost in the healthy eating thing. Because I eat lots. I love big portions. I eat very fast. And if I love the texture and taste of my healthy meal I want to go on eating more of it.
So I decided to do some of these things in order to notonly get back my groove for good, but in order to stop stressing so much over the scales.
So on Sunday I asked Angelos to become my Barbara for 10 minutes every week. Barbara used to be my leader in WW. And she used to weigh me in every week too. We decided that Wednesday will be my weigh in day. He will wake me up on Wed morning, get the scales out of his hiding place, weigh me in, and then hide them back again. He will also make me measure myself every second Saturday. I found a notebook with some measurements of mine that date back to June 04, and I reckon I will measure myself this evening and see the difference from June last year. He is going to buy me a measuring tape.
Then I will also calculate BMI. And body fat. And all the cool things all the cool kids do. (hey..cool kids...wanna gimme some useful links to play with? ;o). Cos I wanna be cool and loose the rest too!
And as I found all my WW material, although I am still toying with the thought of really joining WW since now they just introduced the Flex Points (we were doing winning points when I was going, and all my books are about winnign points too), I am going to give it a go by myself, to save the cash.
I am also going to set mini goals, but this won't happen before Wednesday, that I will weigh in. In the meantime, since I strongly think that my weight has been up to about 90-92 kg (I still do not want to look at the scales), I will start with 24 points. This is what my book says. 90 - 100 kilos should eat 24 - 29 points a day. I will stick to 24. On Saturday, while we were doing our groccery shopping, I was counting points while shopping.
And this morning, I did woke up and hit the treadmill immediately. I was prepared from last night. I had my running shoes next to my bed, I was wearing my favourite treadmill tshirt to sleep (a black nike one that says Just Do It!) and had also made a mix of songs for 31 mins in Winamp ready to play in the morning.
It was better than the other days. I really need to find ways to ammuse myself while walking in the treadmill in the study, till it gets warm again and bring it back to the living room so I can watch telly. But just looking out of a window does not do it for me. And although I can stay for longer, I get really bored and stop earlier than planned.
But the music today did the trick, so for 31 mins I was walking at 6.4 km/h and singing and moving my hands too!
My plan is to stick to 30 mins every morning, then try and do a bit more in the evenings when I get back home and while dinner is cooking.
Then from next week I will increase the time to 40 mins, and gradually get back to my 50 - 60 morning work outs.
I am armed again. All I need is to not conveniently forget where I've put my weapons!
Thank you Kimba for the help!!!!